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The sound of laughter

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Skye Thomas
When youre searching for your Mr. Right, I want you to pay close attention to his laugh. It may seem odd for me to say that, but you can tell a lot about a man by his laugh. Real laughter is uncontrollable. For just a moment something strikes us as funny and the sound of laughter pours forth spontaneously and without any real control on our part. It bubbles up and gives away the secret part of us that thinks the event or situation presented is funny. Laughter can be faked, but thats part of what I want you to analyze when youre listening to his laughter.

First of all is his laughter real or fake? You can always tell when someone has one of those completely goofy laughs that nobody in their right mind would choose to have -- those silly sounding laughs that cause everyone else to laugh too. Youve also heard those completely fake laughs that sound like a bad actor in a Dudley DoRight play! Most people have fairly normal sounding laughs and they are spontaneous. If the guy youre interested in fakes his laugh occasionally to laugh at a small childs attempt to tell a joke, thats okay. But, if he fakes his laugh on a regular basis, I would seriously question his overall ability to present his authentic self to the world. You may or may not feel like analyzing why hes faking it, but its important to note if hes presenting a false joviality to the world on a regular basis.

Does he laugh easily? Ive met a few men who had serious anger and violence issues. They dont laugh easily. Also, guys going through depression and other darker emotions obviously arent going to laugh as easily as someone whos naturally happy and at peace with his life. The brooding silent type may seem sexy for awhile, but in the long run, youre going to want to have some lightness and fun in your life too. It gets to be a real bore to hang out with someone whos always incredibly serious and entertaining darker thoughts.

Does he laugh at people or with people? Nobody likes to be made fun of, but this has more to do with what your man finds as funny. Does he find humor in ridiculing others? Does he laugh at others because everyone is incredibly foolish or stupid in his eyes? Is he constantly critiquing people looking for a reason to laugh at them? It doesnt matter how witty or funny his presentation, its not a good sign if your man takes his personal pleasure in laughing at others. You also dont want someone who constantly makes himself the butt of all jokes either. Ive always found an underlying self esteem issue when people spend a lot of time making fun of themselves. Thats not the same as being able to laugh at ones mistakes on occasion. Im talking about habitually devaluing ones self. Also, is he able to find joy in someone elses jokes? You dont want someone who only laughs at his own jokes and nobody elses.

Does the sound of his laughter fill you with joy? Listen to the actual sound of his laughter. Does the sound make your heart go pitter patter? It doesnt matter if he sounds like thunder on a summer day or if he giggles like a little girl! What matters is that his laughter is infectious and makes your heart lighten. Imagine coming home from a really bad day at work. Upon entering the house, you hear his laughter coming from the kitchen. Does that sound lift your spirits? Or infuriate you even more? You want to be with someone whos laughter makes your heart sing. Laughter is the best medicine and you want to chose a man whos laughter heals your weary mind.

Do you laugh at the same things? Yes, you want to be your own person with your own interests and your own unique sense of self, but you also want to share good times with your partner. You need to pick someone who has a similar sense of humor to your own. Theres nothing worse then having your partner roll their eyes like youre so uncool every time you burst out laughing. What determines a persons sense of humor is wide and varied, including upbringing and level of education. If you share the same overall sense of humor, chances are that you are fairly compatible in those areas. Youre somewhat on the same wave length.

Do you laugh at the same time? You want to pretty much agree on when is the proper time and place for goofing around and making each other laugh. If he likes to crack jokes and laugh a lot during foreplay and you find it to be a total turn off, then youre going to have problems. If he keeps laughing at your girlfriends when youre trying to have a serious conversation, then youre not going to get along so well. This also works in the other direction. If youre the one who is constantly laughing and joking and hes the one getting upset that your timing is inappropriate, then youre not going to like hanging out with a fuddy duddy. Compatibility shows itself in little things like timing.

If youve already got a guy and youre considering spending the rest of your life with him, start watching his laughter. Decide if the things you see are what you want in a lifetime companion. If you dont have a man, imagine sitting at the kitchen table over coffee and hearing his laughter at something witty youve just said. How would it sound? How would it feel to be in his presence when he was laughing? Look for a man whos laughter heals you rather than grates on your nerves. And make sure you both laugh together and often. Itll get you both through the tough times.

Skye Thomas

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