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A dating dilemma

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Kara Oh
More and more I talk to men who just don't want to deal with dating any more. They say it's easier to stay home or go out with their men friends. Women are complaining that their phone isn't ringing. Not only is it difficult for people to meet it's equally difficult to know how to behave on a date.

The overwhelming majority of single people do want to meet someone, but they don't know where to go. Here are some suggestions. Public lectures and workshops are excellent for meeting people with similar interests. They're filled with women. So, men, start watching the paper and select topics that you find interesting. If you're interested and she is, you begin with something in common.

Adult education classes are also good. Women tend to get out and do things because they prefer not to sit around and "wait for the phone to ring." Again, pick subjects you find interesting.

If you're a man looking for a serious relationship, go to relationship classes and lectures. The women you find there are also interested or they wouldn't be there. Be sure and watch for the wedding ring because the percentage of married women at a relationship lecture is higher than a lot of other evening classes.

Never turn down a private party or wedding. It's perfectly acceptable to go without a date and people are comfortable because they know at least the host and/or hostess. People are happy, their hearts are open, and they're feeling festive, which makes them more open and friendly.

Public parties are good too, but people are not quite as relaxed. So you have to work a little harder to get through their barriers. Generally, there are a lot of single, available, fun people at these kinds of events. Watch your local paper for theme events in public parks, dances, concerts, parades, and ticketed events.

Another fun way to meet is to borrow a puppy. Walk around or sit in a well-trafficed spot that will have a lot of happy people. Few can resist a cute puppy. Conversations begin very comfortably because you can focus on the puppy, and have something easy to talk about. The reason to borrow is because bigger dogs don't have the same effect. Not everyone is a dog lover, but most everyone loves puppies.

The above suggestions make it easy to start conversations because there are built-in interests to get you started. Something to remember: everyone is just as nervous as you are and waiting for someone to get things started. It might as well be you... and maybe a cute puppy.

Kara Oh

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